Top 5 Irrelevant Google Images Results: Pickled Pigs Feet

            In my post yesterday, I told you that I’d been mulling over an ongoing serial of posts to put up every now and again: Top 5 Irrelevant Google Images Results. Currently I’m doing some concept art for a short story I want to write, and some of my searches produced…less-than-relevant results. For instance, searching Google Images for “bright green eyes” gave me something like this:

            Yeah. I, uh…I don’t know. I really don’t.

            Then, the other week, I attempted to come up with something similar to that for my first Irrelevance post. I have a permanent mental Post-It saying, “WHEN YOU TRY ON PURPOSE, YOU GET NOTHING.” And it’s true, really. Tonight I searched Google Images for a Facebook profile picture I’d like, and when I typed in “p,” I got “pickle,” and one of the suggestions below that was “pickled pigs feet.” Well…I’ve never really seen one up close or out of a jar. Curiosity took over.

            Without trying, I got my first post.

            5) This mug shot:

I’m pretty sure there was an article about sausages linked (see what I did there?)

to this picture, but I didn’t go to the blog. I’m distracted easily enough

as it is. Roaming more than I planned is a good way for me to

forget anything I had planned to do until I’m half asleep.

Cake Wrecks, you’re amazingly distracting. And I love you all.

            4) A fried pig’s head:

Not sure what this has to do with pickled pigs’ feet, but sure, Google. Sure.

            3) Armour canned pork brains (BONUS: they're in milk and gravy):

This is real. I’m not joking. Yes, it is disgusting. Eating a brain is like

eating the thoughts and memories and feelings of the person/animal

from which the brain came. I don’t savor that thought.

            2) Cats sniffing a chess piece:

I honestly can’t think of anything to say about this.

1)      The Keebler Elves:

…I…just can’t…

Maybe the Keebler Elves have an underground butchering business...?

            I can’t really bring myself to think too hard for an explanation to some of these, and sometimes I think delving too deeply into mysteries like Google Irrelevance can bring about things we regret seeing or reading about. For posts like these, I’ll take the mystery at arms’ length, thank you.